Surrogacy is often described as one of the greatest gifts a person can give another family. For individuals and couples who cannot carry a pregnancy themselves, a surrogate can make parenthood possible. Many surrogacy journeys end with healthy babies, grateful parents, and lifelong friendships. But what happens when things don’t go according to plan?
The recent story involving surrogate McKenna West has sparked passionate conversations about surrogacy, medical ethics, abortion, contracts, and the complicated reality of what happens when unexpected circumstances arise during pregnancy.
As I followed the story, I realized something. This wasn’t just about one family. It was about trust.
The McKenna West Surrogacy Story
McKenna West was serving as a surrogate for an intended couple when, around 20 weeks into the pregnancy, doctors diagnosed the baby with Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome (HLHS), a serious congenital heart defect that affects the development of the left side of the heart. Babies born with HLHS often require multiple surgeries and specialized medical care after birth. From there, the story becomes complicated.
According to McKenna, the intended parents wanted her to terminate the pregnancy. She says she chose not to and eventually relocated from California to Texas before giving birth.
The intended parents have publicly disputed that claim, saying they never requested an abortion. Following the baby’s birth, the intended parents were granted custody, named their son, and later sought a restraining order against McKenna.
As you can imagine, the story quickly spread across social media, with people taking sides.
Why This Story Isn’t as Simple as Choosing Sides
I’ll be honest. The more I read about this case, the more I found myself torn. Part of me understands the intended parents’ perspective.
Surrogacy isn’t simply an emotional investment—it’s often a significant financial one as well. Many families spend well over $100,000 pursuing surrogacy, all while placing enormous trust in someone else to carry the child they’ve dreamed of having.
Contracts exist for a reason. They establish expectations, responsibilities, and plans before a pregnancy ever begins. But then another part of me thinks about the surrogate. Pregnancy changes people.
It’s one thing to imagine how you’ll respond to difficult situations before you’re pregnant. It’s another thing entirely when you’re the person feeling every kick, attending every appointment, and hearing unexpected news about the baby you’re carrying.
I don’t think this story has easy answers. And maybe that’s exactly why so many people have been debating it.
My Family Has Experienced Surrogacy Too
This story also hit close to home because someone in my own family has walked this journey. My cousin and his fiancée welcomed their son through surrogacy after investing approximately $150,000 into the process. (I didn’t even know he had it like that!) Thankfully, their story ended with a healthy baby boy. But it wasn’t without stress.
During the pregnancy, the surrogate decided she wanted to deliver in Florida rather than Georgia, where my cousin lived. That decision meant making a long drive home with a newborn while carefully stopping every couple of hours because newborns shouldn’t remain in car seats for extended periods.
When I later asked him if he would ever choose surrogacy again, he didn’t hesitate. “No.”
Not because he regrets becoming a father. Far from it. He simply wasn’t prepared for the emotional uncertainty that came with the experience.
His story reminded me that while surrogacy creates beautiful families every single day, it also requires navigating situations that no contract can completely anticipate.
Why Communication Matters as Much as the Contract
One thing this story reinforced for me is that contracts are important—but communication may be even more important.
Before a surrogacy journey begins, intended parents and surrogates spend time discussing medical care, expectations, legal responsibilities, and compensation. But difficult conversations shouldn’t stop once the paperwork is signed.
What happens if prenatal testing reveals a serious medical condition? How will decisions be made if complications arise? What happens if beliefs or values no longer align during the pregnancy?Â
Those conversations aren’t easy, but they’re essential. No contract can predict every situation life might bring.
My Takeaway
The McKenna West story isn’t just about surrogacy. It’s about trust. It’s about communication. And it’s about recognizing that even carefully planned journeys can become incredibly complicated when real life enters the picture.
Many surrogacy stories end exactly the way everyone hopes they will—with a healthy baby and grateful parents. Those stories deserve to be celebrated.
But the difficult stories deserve our attention too, because they remind us that behind every contract are real people trying to make impossible decisions.
Whether you agree with McKenna, the intended parents, or find yourself somewhere in the middle like I do, I hope this story encourages more honest conversations about surrogacy before a pregnancy ever begins. Sometimes the hardest conversations are the ones that matter most.
This article is for educational and informational purposes only and should not be considered legal or medical advice. Every surrogacy arrangement is unique, and individuals should consult qualified legal and healthcare professionals regarding their specific circumstances.
Until next time, take care of yourself the way you take care of everyone else.
It’s Yoni Mack. 💛